by Phillip Kopper, author and publisher
Ten Best Reasons to Vote for Trump (or Not)
1) Approaching 80, if he dies in office (or succumbs to the 25th Amendment) he will be succeeded by a graduate of the Yale Law School.
2) Claiming abuse by Biden’s pesky Justice Department, he will bring the DoJ to heel and show how prosecutory persecution is done.
3) He will pardon the thousand-plus “patriots” convicted of storming the Capitol in order to reduce federal spending (in Bureau of Prison outlays at least).
4) To shrink the federal bureaucracy, he will appoint Elon Musk to disband the regulatory agencies that inhibit his operations.
5) He will impose tariffs in order to grow the GNP by raising prices across the board.
6) He will run the government “like a business,” applying his own experience as a businessman whose acumen is proved by his six bankruptcies.
7) Rather than follow the complex “rule of law” dating from 1789, he will simplify governance by suspending the Constitution.
8) With the economy growing at 3.2%, wages rising faster than inflation, and the stock market soaring, he says America is in decline and boasts “I can fix it.”
9) Speaking in opaque generalities, sentence fragments and random rambles, he continues to relieve listeners from having to pay attention.
10) He will expand presidential power exponentially to compensate for Congress’s dysfunction (thanks especially to the House Republican Caucus).
Bonus) Since America’s motto E Pluribus Unum is in a foreign language, he will replace it with the pithy “So what?”